the journey to self enlightenment through television

Category Archives: Reality TV

I was shocked.  Literally shocked.  To the point where I knew I had to post immediately, but at the same time I couldn’t think of what to say.

Opening up the Internet to open up my email is a common routine for me every morning.  I don’t really read much of what’s on the front page of Yahoo’s site.  But this was the top story.

‘Lost Boys’ Actor Corey Haim Dead in Burbank at 38.

And it could have been drugs.  I don’t think anyone would be surprised if it was drugs, as Haim himself admitted to Larry King that he was “a chronic relapser for life.”  Did he really think he had no hope?  Apparently so.

Haim presented with flulike symptoms up to his death, and was getting over-the-counter meds to battle it. 

Corey Haim had struggled with drug addiction since ‘Lost Boys,’ and Corey Feldman had confessed that Haim’s drug addiction affected both their working and personal relationships.  Their show, The Two Coreys, had been cancelled in 2008 after only 2 seasons.

38 is young.  Very young.  And I know we hadn’t really heard much from Corey Haim in a long while, but it’s still sad.

Corey Haim and Corey Feldman were tied into my generation’s adolescence, with movies like Lost Boys, and Lucas, and The Goonies, among many others.

I think I’ll watch The Lost Boys tonite.


Ummm….. So, yeah.

I really have no words to describe the randomness or the complete absurdity of this new show called Shaq Vs. that is currently airing on ABC.

Gentle readers, you all know my feelings on reality television typically wane.  I pretty much think that most reality television is a waste of time.  I can understand why networks continue to produce it, though.  It’s cheap.  It doesn’t cost all that much.  And people are mesmerized by watching things that could be considered REALITY.

But, I’m sorry.  This was just asinine.

This week on Shaq Vs, Shaq goes up against Pittsburgh Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger.  And I can’t pronounce his name, which is neither here nor there.

ANYway, the two go head to head in a 7-on-7 football match at a local Pennsylvania high school football field.

Color me bored confused downright squareheaded about the whole thing.  I actually had no real desire to watch it other than there was nothing else on TV.  And Chriso may have mentioned wanting to see what it was all about.

So.  ABC premiered this show last night in their 9 pm slot, and it will continue to air for the next few weeks, with Shaq going up against other athletes in different sports.  Next week is volleyball.  Coming up, he’ll fight Oscar de la Hoya.  Good luck.

To be perfectly honest, I’d like to see him go up against Takeru Kobayashi, who is ranked 3rd in the world for competitive eating according to the International Federation of Competitive Eating.  Seriously.  Dude can put it away.

Takeru Kobayashi

Competitive Eating is not an athletic sport, per se, but can you imagine watching Shaq try to out-eat Kobayashi?  Seriously.  THAT would be a competition.

But watching Shaq try to beat out other athletes at different sports that he’s not necessarily good at… Yawn.  

Now, I didn’t see the entire show.  Chriso actually watched it from beginning to end.  But I was bored, and making cheeseburgers, so I really only watched the end when they were in the ACTUAL competition, and not the training part.

The insults flew, and the crowd cheered.  

Actually, that makes me wonder what the ratings were looking like for that airing.  And if they’ll be on par for the next couple of episodes or if we’ll see any difference.

One thing I was really impressed with was NOT the actual show itself, but the commercials for all the new shows ABC will be airing in the fall.  I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not really an ABC kinda girl.  I’ve pretty much set my devotions to FOX, but this coming season is looking pretty interesting.  Maybe, just MAYBE I’ll have to check it out.

OH!  And Dancing with the Stars is not a NEW show, but a new season, that I may actually watch this year.  I’ve never seen the show.  Never had the desire to.  It didn’t really catch my attention.  But the previews for this upcoming season have me intrigued.

Mostly because of Kelly Osbourne and Chuck Liddell.  First because Kelly Osbourne does not strike me as the type of person who would EVER do ANYTHING like this EVER because it would be too POP-CULTURE or not dark enough for her.  But then again, the Osbournes have been trying to stay in the spotlight.  And also, I love Chuck Liddell.

Chuck Liddell

I mean, how can you not love Chuck?

ANYway.  I guess I will be staying tuned for next week’s all new episode of Shaq Vs, if for nothing else but a good laugh.  Hey, maybe I’ll pitch Kobayashi to ABC.  Can’t hurt, can it?

What will YOU be watching this fall?


And there was a pre-show.  A BLOODY PRE-SHOW!  Seriously… No. Seriously?  You-betcha-by-golly-wow.  There was a pre-show to the trainwreck we fondly refer to as Britney Spears.  As tonite is the premier of her confessional documentary thing, “Britney: For the Record.”

And what kind of blogger would I be if I didn’t blog about this live, gentle readers.  So, here goes…

10:00 pm  You know, I KNEW there had to be a reason I’ve been seeing more of those annoying Britney fragrance commercials…

10:01 pm  Poor Britney… the world has no idea of your pain… Can you see how badly I feel for her?  No?  Good point.  She seems a little out of it, but maybe she’s always been out of it.  You know something?  I’m half tempted to go off and watch something else.  And THAT was just the intro!

10:02 pm  Clearly, her father requested time in the spotlight.  And needs to talk about the “breakfast of champions.”  Honestly, I think he was just doing that for the cameras.  And now, he’s being reprimanded for entering her room by the cameramen/crew.  Bloody PRICELESS.

10:04 pm  She’s been here the whole time???  News to me.  Because I could have sworn she had a giant dose of crazy and went off the deep end.  Perhaps not, considering she’s been here the whole time.

10:05 pm  And sometimes there are just bad performances.  Yes, I am still watching.  Consider me intrigued, and nearly falling out of my chair.  Because this is just funny.

10:06 pm  She’s grown up a lot, and she’s very weary about a lot of things?  What about her F*ing children?  Do they even matter?  I find it odd that there is no mention, like they never happened.  I wonder if she’ll even talk about them during this “documentary”…

10:08 pm  I wonder if her hair is still fake…

10:09 pm  And Britney would be dead without dancing.  You know, I may have to rethink this decision.  I bet the ratings are high for this airing…

10:10 pm  I like watching her dancers.  10 minutes in, and I’ve found the first thing that I liked…

10:11 pm  Awww, and she’s reminiscing about Justin.  Okay, seriously, relationships come and go… she’s acting like she’s the only one who’s gone through it…  And she finally mentions the kiddos, and her breakup with Kevin.

10:13 pm  I hope this only lasts an hour.  Not sure how much more of this I can take.

10:14 pm  The marriage led her down a strange path, and when it ended, she was alone.  You know, there’s a lot to be said about running away.  There would have been no shame in running away… at least for her.  Especially at this point.

10:16 pm  Tee-hee.  She shaved her head.  And she was being rebellious.  And that was none of anybody’s business.

10:18 pm  Dancing and choreography is a spiritual experience?  I’ll have to remember that.

10:22 pm  Another mention of her kids.  Apparently they meant more than I thought. 

10:26 pm  Yeah, she can’t go anywhere without being swarmed with people.  I almost feel bad for her.  They keyword being “almost.”

10:29 pm  Her first cheap shot at Katie Holmes.  Now it’s on.  As if anybody cared.

10:33 pm  She’s not very social with other people…  and she used the phrase “my baby’s daddy.”  I’m officially on the floor, because I think I’ve died.

10:36 pm  The first commercial.  I think this may go on for hours.  What have I gotten myself into?  And it’s a Britney Spears commercial.  I should have guessed.

10:39 pm  And her dad gets creepy again.  “Nice hooker shoes, baby.”  Color me disgusted.  Her dad was all creepy and weird in the first place, but there was just a whole new level of ick added right on that creepy pie.

10:45 pm  The comparison between celebrity and prison… that’s an interesting way of looking at it.  And she claims her life lacks excitement.  Much like “Groundhog Day.”

10:52 pm  Madonna has a special place in her heart for Britney.  And a soapbox to stand on.

10:53 pm  Apparently, the kids are a part of her life.  Seriously, it would have nice to have made mention of that before…  It’s actually interesting to see her kids actually be in the documentary.  What I want to know is if she has custody of them.  And is Kevin still in the picture with his kids?  Or was this just a show to put on for the crews..?  What I AM surprised at is that they claim her life for this interview was an open book, and that’s great… but they never once ask her about her kids, or her issues with K-fed.  I think that’s the thing that upsets me most about her, the children, and her apparent lack of caring towards them.  HOWEVER, this scene at Halloween makes me question that.

10:55 pm  Day 60.  That means this is almost over.  Apparently, the night before the VMA’s, Britney’s “crew” started following her around, and would stay with her for 60 days.  I’m sorry, but come on.  60 days?  With Britney? 

10:59 pm  Perception is everything, and Britney did this so people could really see.

11:01 pm  And she hates waiting.  What I absolutely LOVE about that statement is that her assistant or choreographer handed her a cellphone with a game to distract her.  What?  Is she 5???

11:04 pm  She’s been through hell, and she’s trying to avoid things of the past.  And she goes through life like a “Karate Kid.”  Have I mentioned this is PRICELESS?

Final Thoughts:

I know I’m not her biggest fan.  I even think the word “fan” is far too generous, mostly because I’ve always thought of her as a fruitloop.  There are only two things I can really give her credit for: her music is catchy (even though I’m thoroughly embarrassed to admit that “Womanizer” is on my iPod), and in the face of the media, the papparazzi, her family, friends, the world… she has come out the other side, virtually unscathed.  Or at least trying to get her life back to a place she wants it to be.  I can respect that.

And I gotta give MTV credit for airing that with a straight face.  AND airing a pre-show… AND a psuedo-post-show.  And then RE-airing it immediately following the first showing, just in case you missed first show.  Okay, seriously.  If I had known they were going to show it again, I probably wouldn’t have watched it in the first place.  Maybe I would have waited for another night, so I could have finished watching True Blood, which I will post about later.


And this is simply because it is nearly 3 am that I am even considering posting about such nonsense.  And the weirdest things happen when you can’t sleep.

And Paris Hilton is looking for a new BFF.  Umm… what???  And also, who cares?

So, I’m sitting here, not sleeping, watching the cat run around like a madman, and channel surfing… and what do I stumble across?  Reality TV gold, if you ask me.  *cough cough*  Yeah, no.  Because we need another reality TV show?  And one about Paris Hilton to boot?  Yeah, no.

In classic reality TV competition form, Paris is searching for a BFF, elimination style.  Everyone is catty and annoying and pretty much out for blood.  There are challenges each Potential BFF (PBFF) has to endure and come out on top, and then it is left up to the group to decide who is more “fake.”  Umm… WHO IS MORE FAKE?  Well, I could have sworn it was Paris… but she’s actually more real than she seems.  She’s a business woman, and she may be shallow and whatnot, but I don’t think any of that is fake… and that is sad.  

I don’t admire Paris Hilton, by any means.  I pretty much can’t watch her in any type of acting role.  And it’s a miracle I can get through her episode of Veronica Mars.  

So, can someone explain to me why she has ANOTHER reality TV show?


Friend of the blog Wayne, over at Segwayne, has kindly pointed out that not all reality TV has gone bad.  And even if it is bad, some of it can still be pretty damn funny.

So, it is to you, gentle readers, that I present the latest findings in reality television, the very bane of my existence.  Who Wants to be a Superhero?!  Created by legendary comic book genuis, Stan Lee, this show is now in its Junior season, and has been airing on Sci-fi.

Each contestant begins with an original idea for a superhero, a self-made costume and their best superhero mojo. From thousands of hopefuls, Stan Lee chooses 11 lucky finalists, who move together into a secret lair. There they begin their transformations — and their competition for the opportunity to become real-life superheroes. Over the course of the series, they test their mettle, try to overcome their limitations and do what it takes to prove that they truly are super.

In the end, only one aspiring superhero will have the inner strength and nobility to open the gates to comic-book immortality. The winner of this competition will walk away with their character immortalized in a new comic book created by Stan Lee himself.

I’m sorry, but could this sound any cooler???  I don’t know where I was to have missed this one, but I can only tell you this: I can’t wait for the new season to start!


And it just keeps getting worse.  I don’t  get it.  Are there really people watching these shows?  Are they really THAT good that the networks keep adding them to the lineup?

Apparently they are.  I don’t buy it, but hey.  I’m not a network exec, so I don’t really have a say.

The latest of the Reality TV horror phase would be from VH1, called Rock of Love: Charm School.  For those of you who missed the train of Bachelor-esque shows in which woman compete for the love of a man, this was exactly that, when they created the original Rock of Love… and before that Flavor of Love… and I’m sure many, many more things.  The most recent Rock of Love was a group of obsessed fans who wanted a date with the one and only Bret Michaels (excuse me while I fall out of my chair laughing…)

Well, guess what.  Your favorite bimbos and pshychotics are back for CHARM SCHOOL.  Honestly, I thought the whole point of those Bachelor type shows was to watch the women tear each other apart, and laugh at how not classy and unsophisticated they were.  I could have sworn that was the whole cache. 

Sharon Osbourne

Sharon Osbourne

But now, take out the man they are competing for, add those same women who were formerly competing, and Sharon Osbourne, and what do you get?  A group of women who STILL hate each other learning to be “ladies.”

Um… what? 

I love Sharon Osbourne.  I really do.  She is such a beautiful woman, and for someone who’s been married to Ozzy and has been through the crap that she’s been through, she has a lot of class. 

And what makes her the perfect host for a show like this?  Even she is making fun at how horrible these women behave. 

Seriously?  Is this seriously airing on VH1 at this very moment?  You betcha!

I’ve been seeing promos for it, and I figured I’d check out because I love Sharon Osbourne.  But I happened  to be channel surfing last night, and stumbled across it… and you wanna know something?  I couldn’t even get through the first 10 minutes of it. 

It had your typical “talking head” type scene where all the women at one point are talking to the camera and commenting on what’s going on.  But seriously, gentle readers, it was less than mindless.  Maybe it had the potential to be a really great reality TV show… if the networks would just relax and understand that nobody cares.  Maybe somebody cares, but really… nobody cares.

I beg of you, high and mighty Network Executives.  Relax with the reality TV.  Yes, it’s quick and easy, and inexpensive to produce.  But some of us out their in the viewing audience prefer quality programming rather than the mindless drivel of yet ANOTHER reality TV show.  Please.  Just please.  Stop.  If you have any respect for your viewers at all.  Please.


EW.com has a fantastic photo article entitled 20 Pop-Culture Hits You Say We Couldn’t PAY You to See.  And holy crap, this list is a little out there.  There are definitely things I agree with, and there are even more I think have no reason to be on this list.   Please keep in mind while reading this list that it is a user created list.  So, there are some things that are more harsh than others.

What I love (and hate) about EW is that they sometimes assume you’ve seen and/or read everything, so they have no qualms about spoilers.  And also, they are very opinionated, which can be a good thing when you’re trying to get a good idea as to whether you want to see the new movie that just came out, but people keep saying it’s crap.

Here is the list as it appears on their website (with my own commentary.  Tee hee):

  1. High School Musical 3 (HSM3) – Yup, they were right with that one.  I didn’t see the first two, and I certainly wasn’t considering seeing the third.  EVER.
  2. Lord of the Rings Trilogy – Apparently, they are doing another movie… yeah, no.
  3. Harry Potter – I know the books are huge, and the first few movies were huge, but I think the franchise is taking a downturn.  Are that many people really still interested?
  4. Oprah Books – Oprah has a book club.  This is not news.  But, to be perfectly honest, if I’m in the bookstore, I will avoid the books that have Oprah Book Club stickers on them.  It’s not that they wouldn’t be good, I just want nothing to do with them.
  5. Buffy and Twilight – Now, it is common knowledge that I’m absolutely enthralled with the Buffyverse, so it’s safe to say that if Joss Whedon has a hand in it, I will probably watch it.  I think EW got that part wrong.  HOWEVER, I’ve read the Twilight books, and they were good (if you can get passed sparkling vampires).  But a movie?  No thanks.  Even the previews make it look unappealing.  Perhaps it will draw in a younger crowd.  But I will not be seeing that one.
  6. The Da Vinci Code – Ok, I’ll admit, I did see this one… only AFTER reading the book.  And I couldn’t have been more disappointed.  AND they are doing a sequel with Tom Hanks.  I’m sorry, but if he’s got long hair in this next one, you can count me out on that one, too.
  7. Godfather – (this list is getting a little insulting).  Granted,  I have not yet lost my Godfather virginity, this is rumored to be one of the best movies ever. 
  8. Bring It On, Bring It On Again, Step it Up to the Streets – Ok, gentle readers.  I will admit to you this: I LOVED the first Bring It On movie.  Everything else was crap. 
  9. American Idol – Well, this one has been taking a pop culture downturn as well.  I think it’s gone on long enough.  And reality TV is just so passe.
  10. The Goonies, ET – Yup, this list is TOTALLY insulting if there are people out there who don’t want to watch  the Goonies.  Come on.  Sloth love Chunk.  What’s not to love???
  11. The Hills – Nope, wouldnt’ do this one.  It’s not that I haven’t tried.  What I find upsetting is that it is scripted reality TV.  And I realize there are people out there who basically want me smacked for saying that, but come on.  That is exactly what it seems like.
  12. 300 – Sadly, I saw this movie.  And it was just plain horrible.  I didn’t get it.  I didn’t like it.
  13. Passion of the Christ – I don’t like Mel Gibson, so it should be no suprise that I didn’t see this one.  Also, I went to Catholic Church AND school… I think the ending is predictable at this point.
  14. The Sound of Music – Um, I have no angst or hatred towards this one.  And perhaps one day I will sit down and watch it… but today is not that day.
  15. Titanic – Yes, gentle readers.  I have seen this one as well.  And I’m not ashamed to admit to you now that it is one of my guilty pleasure movies.  It’s up there with Dirty Dancing, When Harry Met Sally and Bring It On.
  16. Jaws – This was one of those movies that my parents wouldn’t let me watch until I was old enough.  When I finally did see it, I had nightmares for a month.  I’m older now, but sharks are still a little scary.
  17. Scarface – I haven’t seen this one in all its glory.  This was one of the few I should give a second chance to… only after I’ve seen the Godfather.  Al Pacino is awesome!
  18. Friends – Wow, that’s harsh.  I will sometimes sit and watch a few episodes if it’s on.  But I wouldn’t go out and buy the entire series on DVD.  That’s just a waste.
  19. The Simpsons – For a show that’s run for nearly 20 years, I find it a little hard to believe that anyone woudn’t want to watch.  It’s funny… but again, wouldn’t go out and buy the entire series.
  20. James Bond – I don’t think I have words for this one.  I’ve never seen a James Bond movie, and maybe I never will.  But maybe that will change.  There are just so many, it would be hard to catch up at this point.

Well, it’s been an interesting list.  Let me know how you feel about the above list, gentle readers.  Were you at all outraged at some of the titles on there?  Or did you agree with most of  them?