I’ve been watching Big Love lately.  I picked up the DVDs of the first season a few years back and found myself fascinated with the show.  I don’t believe in the idea of Polygamy.  Do I believe it exists?  Sure.  But I don’t see it as something that could ever be successful as a practice.

It is human nature, as it is animal nature to not be monogamous.  The difference is that, as humans, we have the ability to change our habits and behaviors.  Humans are a jealous species, so it makes sense that we would try to make monogamy a natural practice.  But the idea of polygamy just doesn’t fit in my brain.  But more power to those who can make it work.  It just has no place in my life.

With that said, I absolutely LOVE Big Love.  Bill Paxton is amazing, and the actresses that play his wives are equally amazing, and fascinating characters to watch.

Big Love has been On Demand for awhile.  I tried catching the second season, but I only got through 2 or 3 episodes before I realized that it had switched to the third season and blah blah blah.

SOOO… I’ve been watching the third season (and I’m sure I’ll go back to see what happened during the in between times), and I find myself just as fascinated with the show as I was in the first place.  And also much lonelier.

I’ve broken down the basic plot points from each season into three simple themes:

  • Season One is about Family.  The family dynamic gets tested and pulled and damaged over and over again.  It introduces the idea of a mixed family, in the sense that there are 3 wives and mothers, 8 children and 1 father/husband who try to uphold and maintain family values based on their religious beliefs.
  • Season Two is about the individual, and how much damage can cause more damage.
  • Season Three is about Community.  The Compound is in jeopardy, a new wife is brought in and abruptly leaves, and new characters come and go.  The idea is how can faith survive if the community is falling apart…

No matter where the story goes, it’s an interesting one to see develop.  And with the fourth season starting up in January (I don’t remember the date, but I do remember seeing it on the previews after the season 3 finale), I think it can only get better.

With all of that said, I feel for each of  the wives.  They deal with constant loneliness, most of which hasn’t been seen until the third season, where their core beliefs are being threatened.  Barb is going to be excommunicated.  Margie is struggling with the fact that she wants to work.  And Nikki does some horrendous things to the family and to herself that just makes your skin crawl.

But how can you not feel for these women.  They have put everything into the family model, but each, having their own issues to deal with, must deal with the fact that they are Sister Wives on their own.  Barb, being the FIRST wife seems to have it the hardest, as she is the First Wife, and therefore must lead the other wives and be the role model.  But how can you be a role model when you were put into a situation you were uncomfortable in in the first place and shaping your life around an ideal that needs to be hidden, as it is being persecuted.

The long and short of it is this: everyone experiences some bout of loneliness, and everyone deals with things in their own way.  But I feel badly for the wives in this particular marriage because no one can seem to get their footing, and to each of them, including Bill, the patriarch, it seems like the entire family is falling apart – and falling from the path.